It's Not a "G'day" for the Black Mass Festival

An Australian black metal festival has been cancelled technically by an act of God. A Sydney club stopped the Black Mass Festival two weeks before bands such as Naxzul, Erebus Enthroned and Wardaemonic were to form a "diabolical union of Australia's black metal elite" and participate in a "once in a lifetime live ritual and special black mass performance." Turns out not all of Australia is into that.

It's odd that Australians would have such a problem since, if my geography is right, all their crosses are upside down, but Christian groups protested until the club nixed the whole goddamn thing.

One guy from the Newtown RSL in Sydney's Inner West (I have no idea what any of that means) was even death-threatened. He said "I've had two threats. One was a phone call and one was an email which I deleted immediately," which translates to "I'm a fucking liar." But even if they were bonafide threats, doesn't this prove there was nothing to worry about? I mean, nowadays you can't glance through the internet without hearing about a throng of teen Bieber fans threatening to mutilate the genitals of some sad sap who crossed their dreamboat's path. If black metal acolytes were truly going to engage in menacing activities and actually enact an “unholy spell to be cast upon the city of Sydney” then those motherfuckers are going to do it, not just wait for a new venue while bellyaching on the internet. But I guess for those of you who are worried your kvltness is being threatened at every turn, congratulations, you still frighten old religious people. Go throw another Christ on the barbie, mate.